Whatif,

You sound like you are jumping up and down..I was surprised to read you are not?! So, how long did you date him for before he disappeared? and how long has it been since you last saw him?

Tell us more about him and your feelings about him...It sounds to me like you have way more excitement than you are leading on to...::)) it is ok to be excited...it is feels good!!!::)))

xoxoxoxoxo

Damn guys anyway!!! Ha! Are you happy?? If so then I am happy for you. Go and enjoy that drink and maybe a kiss for old times sake too? ;) You deserve to be happy and fill me in please! :)

You got that too Strong? She's not jumping up and down...RIGHT! Like we are all blind here. ;) I am posting an update on Mr. Yankee and Steve (already posted his) so come take a peek. :)

Don't you love those emails from out of the blue? Good for you for not jumping up and down with excitement. Just take it as it comes!! Let us know what happens.

Got the drink...and the kiss...and some very interesting conversation...I'll have to fill you in tomorrow as dinner #2 is waiting....

I am not a player!!!!

:-D

Ha Ha!! keep telling yourself that...you rascal!! I'm so glad you got both! i want to hear all about it and why is it again that I have to wait until tomorrow!!??

She's such a tease!

Because she has so many men and so little time.

Whatif,

This really is a great topic and I am glad you brought it up. I have been harping on something that relates to this. A lot of the situations on this board are women wanting to solve the men delima now now now. It doesn't usually work that way and you are a prime example. They usually come back around if you just go on with your life and not stress about it. It's all about timing and not always our timing. It could be months, but my philosophy is what's the big hurry.

We meet a guy and we click and we think oh my where is this going, we over analyze, wonder what they are thinking and feeling and things progress and one day he just vanishes.

The flip side, guy meets us, enjoys our company, thinks we are great but is in no hurry for anything (most men don't have a desire to rush towards a commitment). Then they get distracted with something else. A few days go by and they think I will call her soon. A few more days go by and they thing (because of women in their past) if I call her now, she is going to ask all kinds of questions. A few more days go by, he thinks if I call her now she is probably going to cuss me and get all emotional and ask questions and make me feel like a heel so maybe I just won't call.

Fast forward a month, two months maybe longer. He wakes up one day and thinks, wow I really liked whatif, she was fun and she has not once bothered me about my vanishing act. Maybe she is pretty cool. I think I will call her.

And there you sat having cocktails with him. That's how it works a lot of times really. It's all about timing.

Whatif, so glad for you. What Robin has said is so true.

The flip side, guy meets us, enjoys our company, thinks we are great but is in no hurry for anything (most men don't have a desire to rush towards a commitment). Then they get distracted with something else. A few days go by and they think I will call her soon. A few more days go by and they thing (because of women in their past) if I call her now, she is going to ask all kinds of questions. A few more days go by, he thinks if I call her now she is probably going to cuss me and get all emotional and ask questions and make me feel like a heel so maybe I just won't call.

Fast forward a month, two months maybe longer. He wakes up one day and thinks, wow I really liked whatif, she was fun and she has not once bothered me about my vanishing act. Maybe she is pretty cool. I think I will call her.

And there you sat having cocktails with him. That's how it works a lot of times really. It's all about timing.
---------
Timing for them; Love from you...

Auds
xoxox

Ok, here's the scoop and perhaps it reminds us to treat every situation differently and not always worry so much about "rules".

We had drinks, dinner and throughout he made a couple comments which were flattering however reminded me of my dillemna with him because he is the only person I have had a physical relationship before I was certain there was any type of future. If y'all remember, I was a bit concerned whether he was simply seeking FWB.

So after a couple hours he straight out asks me, "Are you going to invite me to your house". And I said no. Without all the details, basically he floored my by saying he had been sure he was more interested than me, he didn't count phone calls however it was obvious when his phone never rang, so he quit calling - and then wondered if I'd even noticed.

I decided to play it straight, told him that I really enjoyed spending time with him, it was my problem that I didn't know how to handle a physical relationship without knowing if that was the sole reason he was spending time with me, that I'm not looking for declarations of love or talk of a future, however I need to feel there is an element of enjoying spending time with me above the physical...or it's not my scene.

He responded that in his experience when you find someone you enjoy spending time with, and the chemistry is there, you go with it and everything else works itself out. He told me he's not the type to have one-night stands or FWB, said his only one-nighter was unintended, but the sex was SOOOOO bad there was nothing he could do to bring himself to see her again lol. Hopes to never experience that again!

And I told him he sure seemed that way, but how was I to have known? And if I asked....well how many men would answer "yes, I'm only here for sex"? So I was wary, and cautious, and he was astute enough to pick up on it.

So...we talked another couple hours about all kinds of other things, he drove me to my car since I had to park way in the back, kissed me goodnight...watched to be sure I got in my car safely and it started (he's very sweet that way), and drove off.

And then I violated all the rules!!! I went home and sent him an email, thanked him for dinner, said it was great to see him, call soon.

I thought I'd nip that perception of lack of interest in the bud.Nothing yet but he's working today.

I'll let you know.

lol Robin!!! Way to little time, what's a girl to do?

How far are you from Mobile? I'm interviewing for a VP job there. Is it driving distance?

I think around 6 hours or so, not sure, when you going? Have you looked in South Carolina, we have lots of good ole bubbas here.

Hey, girls. I THOUGHT I MIGHT FIND YOU OVER AT WHATIF'S PLACE:)
First of all, Wobs...
hey, ya never NO...

Whatif, you are not a mind reader. How could you have known?
He's not a player but you were cautious and he picked up on THAT.

IMO, you were a good person then and a good person now.
That won't change.
But other situations DO.

How come I wasn't invited to "Bubba Town"? LMAO
Auds
xoxox

Audrey you have an open invite always! Hop on that plane.

Hey Robin,

By the time these men have realize they missed me, I've already started with someone else. They no longer are a prospect. Much like that crazy ex of mines from two years ago. Calling me and picking an arguement. It's sad he's so miserable about me doing well. He needs to find a way to piss me off. The thing is he's wasting his energy. I just hang up and laugh.

I think you've made a really good point there Robin.

My job search is nationwide, so you never know. I would love to get back to the southeast. I lived in Atlanta for 6 years and Augusta for 2, so I've dealt with my share of Bubbas - some who actually go by that name lol.

I have a couple really funny southern bible belt stories, best told in person so I'll save them for the next goddess get together.

whatif, your post answered some questions for me. :) Like how to bring up that sensitive subject before becoming intimate. He as much as said he doesn't hear from you enough...so, there you are. He's busy, like you said and I feel he will call.

Bubbaville. LOL