Update.. need advice
Mon Nov 23 2009 - 08:23 am
I keep jumping everytime I get a text, IM from him, I have pushed the reply by 2 hours, whoopie, but that is alot for me, but now I am so confused on what to do, we went through the running away stage, he is still not ready for the commitment so I told him I will give him space and no pressure, great! but he was in contact for about 3 days straight then he was with his kids and he was late in replying then said he was tied up cause he was picking them up then he called me back and left a vmail, great, I didn't call back or anything the next morning I emailed him, didn't hear anything till the next day at noon, i got a crumb email back, then a couple hours later a IM and I ignored that too. so my question is do I do call him today around the same time he contacted me, monkey see monkey do? or just keep no contact till I get more response from him? he loves me etc.. but I think he is going through the motions?????
and I know not to make a big deal out of it, keep it light and airy but do I ever say anything, I just got spoiled to hearing from him everyday all day...
Raichel
Mon Nov 23 2009 - 10:06 am
No contact, he will take notice of this more than anything else. It plays on thier imagination and that is your best weapon here. Let him wonder, hmmmmm why is she not calling, she always calls, she is crazy about me. She must be doing something else, has she met someone else? Is she fed up with the crumbs I am giving her. Sit back and let him step up. If he doesn't well there is your answer.
Mon Nov 23 2009 - 10:18 am
God, Thank YOU, I needed that!!!!
Now I am on my way to Goddess status!!!!!!!!
Raichel
Mon Nov 23 2009 - 02:20 pm
When do you actually respond? I am such a dating nerd!!
Sun Nov 29 2009 - 06:40 pm
He emailed me after 4 days of me not contacting him, he said he had the swine flu for the past 4 days, and hope I had a great thanksgiving.
I replied back a few hours later with a joke, that is one way to lose weight, and that my kids had that and glad he feels better and thanksgiving was good I rolled out of the house from eating too much.
That was friday, haven't heard from him since now sunday.. why do they come in and out like this, is he just trying to hang on to something, he obviously doesn't yearn for me to want to talk more or even see me, he will be in florida this coming week, still 4 hours away, but last time he was here, I went there and we drove back together but no mention of that at all. I deserve more, I am slowly getting over him, but still have such feelings for him, next time he contacts me, I will completely ignore him unless he is saying he will be at my house at a certain time..
Mon Nov 30 2009 - 09:48 pm
Raichelraichel,
How long have ya'll been dating?
Wed Dec 02 2009 - 09:36 am
We have been long distance dating since September, but November 1st is when all hell hit, for the past month he IM's me I respond then don't hear from him again for 3 or 4 days, he im me again on Monday night but I ignored it and still haven't heard from him, I keep picking up the phone to call nim but I stop myself, I am dating others but can't get him out of my head and heart!!! I am going crazy!!!
Wed Dec 02 2009 - 02:05 pm
Trust me, I know how you feel. (going crazy) Been there. But the good news is, the longer you keep NC, the easier it gets. I would wait it out. When a man wants to be with a woman, he finds a way. Especially if he knows she wants to be with him, too. Its hard to accept if it turns out that you aren't that woman. I'm still trying to accept that. But its too early to tell in your situation. I mean its only been a couple of months. Now, if 18 months down the road he's still throwing you crumbs, instead of moving mountains to be with you, you gotta move on. (Learned that one the HARD way) Still keep telling myself there's hope. LOL!!! Just keep busy doing other things that you like. It'll work itself out!!!
Wed Dec 02 2009 - 09:51 pm
I broke down today and left him a vm saying that I got his IM the other day and what is up.. he text me back very soon after it letting me know he saw I called and that he is in class.. and will listen to it when he gets out.. I said awesome..your in florida..he replied.. yes I am... stupid me should of said... very nice... but dumb butt me said.. oh we are going to have a cold front, to you it is summer to me it it is freezing.. since he always complains how hot it is here.. how lame o can I be, how am I going to ever be neutral, hard to get acting stupid like that..
the test is if he doesn't come to south florida to visit me then what do i do? tell him that we can not have any contact at all since he couldn't make an effort to visit me? or just keep playing along with his crumbs?
Inspiration Story:
Connect w/ Paige
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