Should I Stay?
Fri Nov 13 2009 - 01:06 pm
Hello everyone. I have been dating my boyfriend for 10 months. I caught him cheating after he repeatly denied doing so. He is still communicating with this female, last night she sent him a text saying that she hadn't heard from him in a couple of days and she was checking on him. He assured me that he had taken care of that situation and that she was not calling anymore. One night I asked to look through his phone to see if she was still calling and I saw where he had been texting another female telling her how beautiful she was and to send him a picture. When I asked him about this, he responded by saying that he went to college with this person and that she was obese and that he was just trying to help her with her self esteem. Mind you, he graduated from college 13 years ago. Last night at dinner, he tells me that his ex of 5 years texted him and said that they should get back together so that she can give him the son that he has always wanted, which is an issue within itself because being pregnant is really tough for me and dangerous. I have two kids and he has a daughter. He wants a son more than anything else in this world. I just don't know what to do. I am really tired of this situation.I really care a lot for him and want to fall in love with him but every other week it is something new with a different female. I am a very attractive female, with a nice shape and have a lot offer to any man that comes into my life. I just don't know what to do. Am I crazy for even staying or should I just continue to wait for this man to get himself together?
Fri Nov 13 2009 - 01:13 pm
You do know what to do, Sunshine. This man is NOT committed to you and if you want a committed and loving relationship I'd begin to look elsewhere. He certainly is.
Look, I know it's easy to sit back and it sure seems like there's a lot of energy spent telling women here to "dump him" but honestly, if you step back and read your post as if someone else had written it, what would you tell this person?
The man cheats (though since you're not married I'm not sure where that falls), and lies about it. He wants a son, which you already know is dangerous for you and you don't love him but "want to fall in love with him."
You already don't want this relationship. You want A relationship...so badly that you're willing to overlook major issues to keep one that is hurting you. That's not healthy for you or for your children. Please be kind to yourself.
Fri Nov 13 2009 - 01:30 pm
Thank you K203. I mean I do love him, I just don't want to because I do not think he is going to do right. I guess I am in la la land and keep hoping that one day he will wake up realize what a good woman he has.
Fri Nov 13 2009 - 01:34 pm
Don't count on it. Seems like he is into quantity not quality.
Fri Nov 13 2009 - 02:02 pm
nicely put Thetababe -- a lot of them are ....
Fri Nov 13 2009 - 02:33 pm
like the other ladies, i will simply say he is unfaithful to you, which you know yourself evidently and not just once but on a no. of occasions. there is more hurt than pleasure in this relationship by the sounds of it. if a man is making u feel insecured then how can he be good in the long term...?!
also he is a liar especially about such issues in a relationship which makes him dishonest and deceitful.
the longer u remain with him the longer your unhappiness will linger on. make the wise choice soon enough.
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