Meet....or pick up? HELP
Sat Nov 14 2009 - 07:05 pm
Ok....it has finally happened. I am going on the first date in 12 years. I have mixed emotions. I am a bit of a cynic (sp?) after a pretty crappy marriage, so I don't really know what I expect. my question is this....in today's times, there are some real nuts out there. I am not sure that I want any man to know where I live until we get to know each other really well. I have a child to think about after all. We have agreed to have dinner, but how do I go about telling him that I would rather meet him there. I don't know if he's an old fashion guy or not, but I don't want to give the impression that I'm being paranoid. Maybe I am, but who cares? Right?
Tue Nov 17 2009 - 03:17 am
#2
That is a perfectly reasonable and safe precaution. Yes, by all means, if it's a first date, meet him there, and you each make your own arrangements for getting back home. Most men are perfectly happy with this arrangement, and for the odd man who isn't, (and there wouldn't be many) all you need say to him is "I prefer to meet you there...I'm sure you understand that these days, a woman does have to be careful!" (Say it with a smile). No need to elaborate or go into long explanations of how you need to look after your duaghter etc etc. He'll be keen to impress you, so just relax, have fun and enjoy!
Wed Nov 18 2009 - 04:45 am
#3
Totally meet him at the restaurant. You don't have to explain much of anything. If he says, "Okay, pick you up for dinner at 8?" All you have to say is, "Actually, I'll have to meet you there...8 is perfect. See you then!"
I've only encountered one man who got bent out of shape at the idea of my meeting him somewhere. Because he said that "gentlemen" pick ladies up at their home--he was obsessed with the idea of being a gentelman. Turns out, he was a total jerk who was rude to the waitress, and almost started a fight with a guy at the bar we went to. Lesson learned--if they insist on something that's totally unreasonable, don't go on the date with them!
I'm sure you'll be fine and have a great time! Let us know how it goes!
I would just straight out and tell him. Or do what I do and tell him that my friends have threatened to put me under house arrest if I get in a stranger's car, lol!
A good guy will totally understand. If he is antsy about it, then that is a red flag anyway.
Always make sure you put your safety first, before his convenience or feelings.