Help! I am irrevocably drawn to a guy 19 yrs younger!
Tue Nov 03 2009 - 12:40 am
Help! I don't want to make another mistake, so I won't. At this time in my early 50s yet still younger for my age, I have mutually attracted this man and he has told me so. He was embarrassed to find out my true age. We have talked briefly about it, agree it's probably not a good idea and he also keeps trying to turn it into just sex, which I am not going there with him.
Still, I know we seem to be drawn on a deeper level. He has 2 kids, still is processing pain from a recent divorce (yikes..I should step lightly round this one, which I am!)..
What are your opinions about dating or loving a man 19 yrs younger.? I can't change how I feel about him, I can change what I DO, however, but I wish terribly he and I could spend time together. I hardly know him and it happened SOoooo fast! We both experienced it!
Elenii
Mon Nov 16 2009 - 11:39 am
#2
Honey, if a man in his 50s wants to have a fling or whatever with a woman in her 30s no one blinks. That is beneath notice.
Don't settle for a strictly physical FWB if that is not what you want but age is just a number.
Personally the number I choose is 32 in my imagination where it counts, even though my birth certificate says 49
Tread lightly. When attraction is this instant, it very quickly turns physical regardless of your best intentions.
That's not to say people with 19 years between them can't be good for each other. You may very well be picking up on a lasting compatibility.
BUT... he's in the midst of a divorce (red flag) there are children involved (another red flag) and you are already having feelings you shouldn't be doing it (the biggest red flag of all!)
If you really want to see if that compatibility is more serious, back off now and see if things come around again when the timing is right. Anything you do now will be completely mired in the feelings and consequences of those red flag circumstances and will not likely produce a lasting relationship.