So my last date was just the night before. On Sunday I was singing and dancing at work. I was so excited and looking forward to my date. We talked on the phone a few times beforehand. Everything felt like it was going to be met with some huge chemistry. He was calling me "hot stuff" all the time. It felt nice to have such a flirty nickname already. But it was met with huge disappointment.

I had the day off today. And normally if I have the day off on a first date I spend all day preparing in dating ritual. Today, was tough. I was completely unmotivated. Finally I decided I better get ready with only 45 minutes before I had to leave. I had to force myself into the mood. I turned on some music and got in the bathtub. I was warming up to the idea of another new date a little. But it was highly unusual for me to feel so blah about the whole thing.

Then I decided in the midst of putting my outfit and makeup together that I would read his profile one more time. I am so glad that I did! There was a line in their about how he wanted to be friends first. It made me feel so much better. No pressure to worry about impressing him or wondering whether he would be attracted enough to me to ask for another date. Plus, I now had an expectation to work with. He is looking for a friend. I can be a friend.

Now, I know what some of you might be thinking right now. But I think in my situation, I have a lot less worries than most women and also encounter fewer jerks. The reason is that I am a Christian and I only date other Christians, because I want the person I settle down with to share my same faith.

When a Christian guy says he wants to be friends first, he's not saying I am looking for a woman to be my FWB or I have a problem with commitment so I date girls and call them friends. Generally Christian guys don't even date multiple people at once or look for a one night stand. In a way, it makes it easier on me, because I generally don't have to worry about running into those types of men. At the same time it makes it harder, because my dating pool is very small. I mean really my only options in meeting a man is church, through friends, or online. So it has it's pros and cons. Sometimes I wish that I could date the guys that hit on me when I am out at a bar or club. But, since they're not Christians I have to turn them down.

Anyhow, the date went well. I brought up the fact that I appreciated his desire to be friends first. And told him why. He explained why he said it too. He told me that in his past experiences of dating, things were based on chemistry and sometimes even got "hot" but a real relationship was never built that was sustainable past a couple months of dating. Basically he realized that he had gone through the normal dating rituals of having fun and feeling attraction. But eventually the attraction would die down and the ideas of fun things to do would wear out. And he was left with someone who he had not built a real relationship with. At the same time he said that with a lot of his friends that are married, he finds that they are best friends with their wife. When he witnesses his friends having relationships with their wives as friends, it makes him see how appealing and attractive it is.

So, this explanation put me at even more ease than I felt when I read "friends first" on his profile. We had your normal first date conversation. There was not a huge amount of chemistry, but he was attractive.

He asked for my phone number. He said that he would think of something fun to do next time and give me a call.

He also was willing to pay for the check at the restaurant. But I laid down my credit card too. He told me to contribute $10. I thanked him. I assumed that he tipped the waiter well.

Hopefully I will hear from him this week. In a way, I'm not really concerned if I get blown off, because I figure I'll have more prospects sticking to the online thing. You do never know when a guy says he'll call you. But what a relief it was to meet a cute normal guy that I may be able to spend more time with!